God Has Kept Me Here For a Reason!

God Has Kept Me Here For a Reason!
This was just sent to me; what a profound letter of comfort. It's difficult for us, as natural men/women to walk away when we've been hurt. Our gut reaction is to strike like a venomous snake; to bite the first one who has unleashed the pain and sorrow. We talk about giving everything to Him, but when we are scared, hurt, or angry we often take each problem back and place it in our napsack of life. Soon the napsack gets heavier and heavier because with each time we take back what we place in his arms, the weight of the issue becomes overwhelming. I hope I can try and learn something from all this; we all need a little help.God Has Kept Me Here For a Reason!May you grow to be as beautiful as God meant you to be when He first thought of you. unknown Light Never Shines Upon Itself"Jesus loves me, this I know, for I have tasted for myself the kisses of His mouth". Mark Davidson"But I am like an Olive Tree flourishing in the house of God; I trust in God's unfailing love for ever and ever." Psalm 52:8God Has Kept Me Here For A Reason! Repeat after me: God has kept me here for a reason. I survived because He has a plan for me. All my bad relationships, the addictions, theconsequences, the bad credit, the repossessions, the death of my loved ones, the back stabbing from my friends, the negative thoughts, or the lack of support; I made it because I am blessed!I release and let go of all past hurts, misunderstandings, and grudges because I am abundantly blessed! I recognize them as the illusions they are, and sent from the enemy to kill my spirit, steal my joy, and destroy my faith; For God is all there is. All else is a lie! Now give yourself a hug, wipe your tears away, and walk in victory! I love you, but more appropriately, God loves you BEST! Be blessed and know that you are at one with THE SPIRIT OF THE LIVING GO D! In addition, may the Lord keep watch between you and me when we are away from each other.Genesis 31:49. Amen! Now since you are a true child of God, you know that with every blessing, a blessing is required!

What did He Die for?

Fighting in His name!
Tears fall
Echo sadness
It’s shear Madness

He’s all about love
Peace—Forgiveness
Not bloodshed
And battle scars

Christ lives!
If we look
Within
This is where
He dwells

That said…
Does He not dwell
in us all?
We fight about
The right

And what is left
Is anger…
Love is gone
Emptyness

No room
For--giveness
So tell me
What did
HE
Die for?

I Have Walked in Their Shoes

I walk along this path
waiting for them to listen
head the call
Shall I continue to wait
and pray for them?


I have walked in their shoes...
Not believing...
in Him who gave it All

When will it hit them?
When they loose everything?
Oh Dear Lord, I pray not--

The pain is so great!
I cannot tell them how much
each night we pray for
Each and every one

for their safety, for guidance,
for knowledge and truth--
Each day and each night we pray...

Yes, we have walked in their shoes,
I carry them in my heart and
hold them in my soul—
a heavy burden but one
of love.

Only a Visiting Teacher?

We think that this calling is underrated; that we should be called to do much more! I mean, why should I be asked to just visit a sister’s home when my talents could be far better spent as in a higher calling? I can just see myself; the President of the Relief Society, awe yes, indeed. Ok, not really folks, I have a story that will show you why this is a great and wonderful calling in and of itself.
As a new member of the church, my world had come apart, crumbled bit-by-bit. My marriage , my life , and my religion was new as well.The loss of a loved one is difficult, to describe the loss of a child is insurmountable. Now, I know that as a member of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints, we are supposed to have a pretty good grasp of Eternity and the idea that families can be forever. However, understand, that I was a very new convert, and my expectations were already on pretty shaky grounds. I had just realized that the priesthood power, as great as it is, was not as powerful as I had been led to beleive. I heard many testimonies time and time again of miricles and heard powerful stories of how through preisthood blessings that when the life of a loved one hung between life and death…life won out. Well, for me, the answer was no. I just couldn’t buy that answer and could not buy into the entire premise either. I felt as if I had been mislead into beleiving a religion of lies! My son was gone—my faith shook, and my soul dead. My children well, I could not take care of me let alone them, I had gone into a talespin to beat all talespins, took my credit cards and maxed them out, quit going to church, stopped listening to the bishopric, home teachers, and anyone else who entered my home.

I would allow my visiting teachers to come, but would immidiately discount anything they would do or say. I, in a word, was done. My husband had quit inviting me to church either. I could see the sadness in his eyes every time he would get dressed and go without me—but without regard, I would pull the covers over my head, turn the other way, an go back to sleep.

Sundays I would go shopping, esspecially because I knew it was the wrong thing to do—because breaking the sabbath hurt the Lord! “Good, I thought, he hurt me!”
I blamed sisters in the ward, by saying the reason for my not attending was that they were snooty, or because they were all too easy to pass judgement on me and my children. It got easier and easier each week—

I did have to say, I did not revert back to drinking, or smoking, or drinking coffee or tea; funny huh? It was like a part of me wanted to remain in the gospel, to linger there and wait—wait for the rest of my soul to awaken again. Then one day, out of the blue, Sue, my visiting teacher, came for visit; it was not the usual Visiting Teaching visit either. She was also Ricky’s teacher at school, but that wasn’t the reason. My children loved her. Sue never patronized them, she has a way with them and well makes them all feel important and loved. She never discounted them for not being members of the church, those who weren’t and she never tried to drag them kicking and screaming into our religion. She just loved—unconditionaly.
Well, for some reason, she came over, I did need her that day, Barry had found out about the credit cards; this could have been the end of a beautiful marriage— I needed a friend, and my best friend was in California; a simple phone call was not going to suffice. I don’t mind saying this time, I was scared!
For most of my life prior to this one lying was the only way to survive. I had learned that telling the truth often put me in more dangerous possitions; my parents beat me, my teachers beraded me, and my ex-husband abused me in ways I still cannot say. So, why in the world would I tell this man the truth?
I had waited for all these months for that shoe to drop, and, I guess, because it wouldn’t on it’s own… I tossed it—hard! This was the only way I knew how to see if he truly loved me—for me.

Barry had went to the bank with the statements in hand, and had found out my lie. I waited knowing that when he came home this could possibly be the end. So many things popped into my mind that day, what really went through was that I deserved the worst beating ever! I didn’t get one. He came in, looked at me with eyes I will never forget—said he had to think, pray, and he’d return. I was never so scared in all my life!

Sue came in shortly after Barry had left, I fell to her waist ( which she is so small campared to me) and just sobbed… I spilled my heart and soul out to her. I Told her I needed help! She held me like a mother would hold an ailing child, so tender and loving. I brushed the tears from my eyes and went after my husband.

Barry and I walked and talked, I told him how sorry I was for the deciept, how I have been in such a fog after Bob’s death and that spending money helped ease the pain… He gently grabbed my tear soaked face, looked deeply into my red eyes and said—“I’m sorry, I never saw any of it, I’m so sorry!” Like any of this was his fault? There was so much this man could have and should have done…he didn’t. What in this world did I do to deserve such a man?

The next day, after Barry had left to Colorado on his run, Sue popped back over to check on me. I was still emotionally worn out but knew everything would work out just fine. We talked for hours, about why I had really been feeling out of touch. I blamed God, church, my new religion, the well- meaning women in our ward who tried to help me cope with my son’s death, and yes, my son as well. I was just angry—it is a part of grief, a very intricate part which most of us deals with everyday. There are a few big stressers in life that are difficult, moving, ( did that twice in three months) loss of loved ones ( lost my grandmothers and son, in three months) and getting married. (did that too!) Let’s not also mention that I had made some rather big changes in my lifestlye to boot! The converstation between Sue and I morphed, it grew to me asking what was the underlined reason for why I stopped going to church? I soon realizd the real reason is that it became comfortable to just—stay—home. Isolation feels good after a while, we learn to love the idea of wollowing in our pain and sorrow, so much so that it becomes easy to drag others in and attatch blame with it. I realized the only reason for me becoming inactive was a terrible sin, slothfulness. I was lazy.
Sue asked me what she could do to help me get to church? Tears fell once again as the burning in my bossom returned; I wanted to come back. The only answer I had for her was: “Can you give me a wake up call?” Bright and early that Sabbath morning I was up, showered, dressed and ready to face the morning! My hand waiting on the phone as it rang!
It was the best wake-up call ever; only a visiting teacher… As Visiting Teachers we do make a difference, we can change lives and help with life-altering decissions. Sue was my guide in the temple, I am forever in her debt. I love her for the spirit she has within and the guidence she recieves and heads from Heavenly Father.
This is one of the greatest calling we have in the church…



We think that this calling is underrated; that we should be called to do much more! I mean, why should I be asked to just visit a sister’s home when my talents could be far better spent as in a higher calling? I can just see myself; the President of the Relief Society, awe yes, indeed. Ok, not really folks, I have a story that will show you why this is a great and wonderful calling in and of itself.
As a new member of the church, my world had come apart, crumbled bit-by-bit. My marriage , my life , and my religion was new as well.The loss of a loved one is difficult, to describe the loss of a child is insurmountable. Now, I know that as a member of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints, we are supposed to have a pretty good grasp of Eternity and the idea that families can be forever. However, understand, that I was a very new convert, and my expectations were already on pretty shaky grounds. I had just realized that the priesthood power, as great as it is, was not as powerful as I had been led to beleive. I heard many testimonies time and time again of miricles and heard powerful stories of how through preisthood blessings that when the life of a loved one hung between life and death…life won out. Well, for me, the answer was no. I just couldn’t buy that answer and could not buy into the entire premise either. I felt as if I had been mislead into beleiving a religion of lies! My son was gone—my faith shook, and my soul dead. My children well, I could not take care of me let alone them, I had gone into a talespin to beat all talespins, took my credit cards and maxed them out, quit going to church, stopped listening to the bishopric, home teachers, and anyone else who entered my home.

I would allow my visiting teachers to come, but would immidiately discount anything they would do or say. I, in a word, was done. My husband had quit inviting me to church either. I could see the sadness in his eyes every time he would get dressed and go without me—but without regard, I would pull the covers over my head, turn the other way, an go back to sleep.

Sundays I would go shopping, esspecially because I knew it was the wrong thing to do—because breaking the sabbath hurt the Lord! “Good, I thought, he hurt me!”
I blamed sisters in the ward, by saying the reason for my not attending was that they were snooty, or because they were all too easy to pass judgement on me and my children. It got easier and easier each week—

I did have to say, I did not revert back to drinking, or smoking, or drinking coffee or tea; funny huh? It was like a part of me wanted to remain in the gospel, to linger there and wait—wait for the rest of my soul to awaken again. Then one day, out of the blue, Sue, my visiting teacher, came for visit; it was not the usual Visiting Teaching visit either. She was also Ricky’s teacher at school, but that wasn’t the reason. My children loved her. Sue never patronized them, she has a way with them and well makes them all feel important and loved. She never discounted them for not being members of the church, those who weren’t and she never tried to drag them kicking and screaming into our religion. She just loved—unconditionaly.
Well, for some reason, she came over, I did need her that day, Barry had found out about the credit cards; this could have been the end of a beautiful marriage— I needed a friend, and my best friend was in California; a simple phone call was not going to suffice. I don’t mind saying this time, I was scared!
For most of my life prior to this one lying was the only way to survive. I had learned that telling the truth often put me in more dangerous possitions; my parents beat me, my teachers beraded me, and my ex-husband abused me in ways I still cannot say. So, why in the world would I tell this man the truth?
I had waited for all these months for that shoe to drop, and, I guess, because it wouldn’t on it’s own… I tossed it—hard! This was the only way I knew how to see if he truly loved me—for me.

Barry had went to the bank with the statements in hand, and had found out my lie. I waited knowing that when he came home this could possibly be the end. So many things popped into my mind that day, what really went through was that I deserved the worst beating ever! I didn’t get one. He came in, looked at me with eyes I will never forget—said he had to think, pray, and he’d return. I was never so scared in all my life!

Sue came in shortly after Barry had left, I fell to her waist ( which she is so small campared to me) and just sobbed… I spilled my heart and soul out to her. I Told her I needed help! She held me like a mother would hold an ailing child, so tender and loving. I brushed the tears from my eyes and went after my husband.

Barry and I walked and talked, I told him how sorry I was for the deciept, how I have been in such a fog after Bob’s death and that spending money helped ease the pain… He gently grabbed my tear soaked face, looked deeply into my red eyes and said—“I’m sorry, I never saw any of it, I’m so sorry!” Like any of this was his fault? There was so much this man could have and should have done…he didn’t. What in this world did I do to deserve such a man?

The next day, after Barry had left to Colorado on his run, Sue popped back over to check on me. I was still emotionally worn out but knew everything would work out just fine. We talked for hours, about why I had really been feeling out of touch. I blamed God, church, my new religion, the well- meaning women in our ward who tried to help me cope with my son’s death, and yes, my son as well. I was just angry—it is a part of grief, a very intricate part which most of us deals with everyday. There are a few big stressers in life that are difficult, moving, ( did that twice in three months) loss of loved ones ( lost my grandmothers and son, in three months) and getting married. (did that too!) Let’s not also mention that I had made some rather big changes in my lifestlye to boot! The converstation between Sue and I morphed, it grew to me asking what was the underlined reason for why I stopped going to church? I soon realizd the real reason is that it became comfortable to just—stay—home. Isolation feels good after a while, we learn to love the idea of wollowing in our pain and sorrow, so much so that it becomes easy to drag others in and attatch blame with it. I realized the only reason for me becoming inactive was a terrible sin, slothfulness. I was lazy.
Sue asked me what she could do to help me get to church? Tears fell once again as the burning in my bossom returned; I wanted to come back. The only answer I had for her was: “Can you give me a wake up call?” Bright and early that Sabbath morning I was up, showered, dressed and ready to face the morning! My hand waiting on the phone as it rang!
It was the best wake-up call ever; only a visiting teacher… As Visiting Teachers we do make a difference, we can change lives and help with life-altering decissions. Sue was my guide in the temple, I am forever in her debt. I love her for the spirit she has within and the guidence she recieves and heads from Heavenly Father.
This is one of the greatest calling we have in the church…

hummingbird

Captured in an element of surprise
dancing wildly among the daffodils
humming flirtatiously
constant imagery
savoring the nectars of God

Wings fly
swiftly beating like
that of a passionate lover
in a feverish embrace!

You’re too quick
my tiny bird
wishing to hold tenderly
delicately—
in the palm of my hand
and just watch…

Reach upwards and Take HIS hand

I want to follow Him
Listen to the words
Walk in the path
That leads me…

Things trip me up
Like contention
Greed—anger—sorrow
And a little thing called
Pity

How can it be that I allow these things
To get in the way
They get in the way of HIS love
What I know is
Righteous
And good

I need to take HIS hand
And let Him lead
The way…
It is not an easy path
Nothing worth having ever is
Is it?

Who would have thought that a pedicure could teach a lesson?

Who would have thought that a pedicure could teach a lesson?
I have heard in many testimony and Relief Society meetings of stories about "The Still Small Voice" and heading the call. Oh, I can testify to many close calls that steered me from danger, happy times, or even those deep dark moments when I know, that He has sent the Comforter, to be at my side. I have felt the Holy Spirit with me so many times in my life, even before I was converted a member of the Church of Jesus Christ, of Latter-day Saints.
Now, before I married my sweet husband, I was a struggling single mother, raising seven children on welfare, working as a waitress, and going to college. I could barely afford food, rent, and bills let alone ever anything frivolous. We shopped mostly at thrift stores and bought shoes for two children at a time, I always came last on the list.
After my children were grown and moved away, it took me quite some time to finally get the courage to do nice things for "just me". (I still shop at thrift stores for my own clothes) The one frivolity girly thing I have decided on for myself has been to get my nails done. All my life, I have chewed them down to the nub, and they look hideous. I actually struggled for weeks going back and forth at the salon waling in and out and looking at the prices before I finally sat down, and stuck out my stubby fingers for them to see.
My feet on the other hand are worst yet. I am diabetic and for many years, they were cracking and bleeding and resembled an old scaly worn out dragon. My nails were yellow and brittle; I don’t like anyone to touch then except my daughter, who always rubbed them for me when they hurt.
Well, after going to the same nail salon for over a year, one day, I felt the strangest feeling; an odd impression kept smacking me like a tap across my head. I got the impression to ask about a pedicure? But kept shaking the feeling off like a bad dream; I hated the thought of spending any more money one me!
Dazed I looked at the posters of the pretty hands on the walls, and listened the piped in music playing in the background. But the impression kept getting stronger pounding in my ears, louder and louder! I could not reconcile getting this for me! Something hit me harder than ever, it would not stop, I had to ask about the price of this stupid pedicure and now!
The next thing I knew, I was sitting in a vibrating chair, warm water filling in a tub and my ugly bare feet was soaking in the sweet scent of lilacs. This thin-framed woman with chestnut hair was stooped over me washing my feet not unlike the Savior.
"Do you believe in God?" She asked quietly.
"Yes, as a matter of fact I do." I replied.
"Well, you are an answer to a prayer."

Another Beautiful Day

Dancing in the Rain
On a warm summer day
Playing ball with buddies
All night, no matter what
The consequences be…
Listening to the sounds of crickets
Playing a virtuoso
Butterflies flitting above
Kissing the blossoms
A gentle breeze brushes
My face
Like the hand of God
Saying, my child, good job
A day like this is celebrated
Greeted with a smile!
And when the sun is past the
Mount, and rest for it’s long and weary day
We grateful thank
Him for ALL
Things
Both grand and small
Amen